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When mixing lunch or dinner with business: 

• Pace yourself with your client.  Don’t leave him or her eating alone or feeling rushed. They will feel more on the same page with you if you eat at the same pace.
• The one hosting usually starts the serious business discussion. Overly eager junior executives can sometimes rush discussion before the decision maker is ready.
• Take tiny bites so you can chew and swallow very quickly to keep the conversation flowing.
• Avoid immediately bringing up work.  Business meals are a great way to build rapport and gain their trust first.  A good time to start the work discussion is after appetizers.  Use coffee and dessert time to summarize key points.
• Keep papers confined and pass them to your guests to look over later, but not while eating if at all possible.
• Arrive ten minutes early if hosting the meal.  Guests should always call if they are going to be late—even by a few minutes.
• Avoid personal topics such as politics, diet, religion or family.  Such topics may offend and alienate guests.  Try talking about current events or news within their industry.
• Include all guests in the conversation. If seated with many people, involve those within close hearing distance. Ensure body language is not shutting anyone out. 
• Remember your manners.  Place your napkin in your lap once seated and don’t put it back on the table until you leave.  If you must excuse yourself during the meal,  place it on the back of your chair or to the left of your plate until you return. For sanitary reasons, it is not advisable to lay it on the seat of your chair. 
• Who pays the bill?  Whoever extended the inviting pays unless other arrangements are appropriate or have been discussed in advance.
• Always say “thank you” to the host.  Send a note of thanks within 24 hours.
• Invitations:  “Let me take you to lunch at such-and-such restaurant” indicates you intend to pay the bill and take command of the table. 
• Going Dutch?  “Let’s have lunch.  Where shall we go?”
• Discuss non-business matters first to create a warm, congenial atmosphere; however, be aware of any tight schedules others may have and honor their time.
• Never plank your knife between the table and plate.  Always set them across the edge of your plate.
• Do not season your food before you have tasted it. Some see that gesture as acting before having all the facts, thus making the individual appear too impulsive. Seriously.
• Never chew with your mouth open or make loud noises when you eat. Although it is possible to talk with a small piece of food in your mouth, do not talk with your mouth full. Take tiny bites.

Following these tips shows decorum, respect and that you are well-mannered AND serious about providing the best in products and services.

• Write a new definition of “who” you are in the workplace. Avoid identifying yourself with the job description but rather identify yourself as a package of skills. This keeps you from determining your value and security level by your previous work. The more you place your value on a job title, the more you will feel a loss of self-esteem or identity when it is gone. Self-esteem is boosted when you focus on all of your accomplishments and transferable skills instead.
• First, examine your history by compiling a comprehensive list of as many achievements, both personal and professional, as you can. Include: personal achievements which contain valuable and saleable skills, including civic and volunteer positions. Write a paragraph describing each achievement. Use action words like organize, negotiate, lead, create, sell. These are clues to your true abilities and interests. Review the list and notice recurring patterns in key words. Use this list as the foundation for your skill-based resume.
• Examine your skills. You will see a mix of the following characteristics. These will help you determine the best career path, one which will fulfill your need to be “you”, and not what someone else wants you to be or do.

o Influence You have a knack for influencing people through leadership, public speaking, marketing, motivating (not manipulating), negotiating.
o Organize. Your organizational and monitoring/tracking ability helps keep you and others managed and on track.
o Helps. You derive enjoyment from teaching, encouraging, nurturing and counseling.
o Creative. You are artistic, theatrical or creative in designing products or events.
o Analytical. You enjoy using math, analyzing data or keeping up with the latest scientific advancements.
o Producer. You like to see the fruit of your labor using hands-on skills—cooking, crafts, construction, or building projects.
o Adventuresome. You are competitive or like to take risks—law enforcement, firefighting, military, athletics.

In today’s workforce, the most desirable are those with the largest pool of skills. See what you can add to your repertoire: advanced computer skills, database research, time management, project management, etc. Best wishes. Let me know your success stories!